INSERT CATHERINE MACKINNON QUOTE HERE
23 02 2009Not really. That bitch sucks.
I’m not yelling. Though maybe I should be. I am angry. As are most in the Fort Knox, KY Warrior Transition Unit I imagine.
I’m mad because a dog and her dip shit handler tracked mud all over my tres chic modern WalMart carpet. And if that wasn’t enough, the 1SG insulted my alma mater. Something about sports. (Like I give a billy-be-frigged about sports.) I pretended to, however, to channel the lukewarm anger I felt at the violation of what little privacy we have. Violated because some fuckhead in Bravo tried to night-night himself with prescription meds.
Two of my neighbors claimed to feel they’d been raped. I wouldn’t go quite that far. I would, however, question what impact this evening’s festivities had on stemming future suicide attempts. This seems like much too little much too late. A “Big Army” PR stunt hidden in Company shit-sandwich-eating interpretative dance (take one down, pass it around, errr, eee eee errr, eeh er eeh err) meant to give the appearance of action to onlookers. But all it really did was stress us, we who don’t really need more stress, at 10 pm on a Monday evening.
Addendum: Since writing this post I’ve learned the young man’s OD was unintentional. He’s okay, more or less, but his condition was touch-and-go for a while. I’ll update when more info is available. Say a prayer for him and his family.
Good Morning. This is not the first time I have read your blog and will say I can understand some of your frustration and some I cannot. I have witnessed my own 6′1″ 180 lb spouse in the floor on hands and knees crying like a baby unable to breathe from the back pain he was experiencing at the time. I am not writing to discuss your physical pain since I am not a physician but the emotional pain of your wife and family. Your wife in particular. Her separation pain. I was an Army spouse for 25 years before my husband retired. I’m sure you can imagine the number of deployments, field exercises, long schools, etc over that number of years which of course took him away from his wife and children for very long periods of time. Over the years I learned that the tears he saw me shed when we finally had to part ways only made the separation worse. I realized that was the last visual impression he had of me. How would that help him stay safe? How would my tears help his deployment go by faster? It wouldn’t. It only made him worry and think of my red, tear streaked face as he left my sight. It’s hard. The hardest job in the Army some t-shirts and bumper stickers say is to be an Army spouse.
Note to Sarah: Be strong Sarah. Grow a tougher skin and find a place to push your tears to until you are out of site of Jimison. He knows how you feel, the loneliness, the helplessness, the worry, the “empty arm syndrome” at night. I hope you can find the strength to hang in there. Save the tears for when he does get to come home and you resume your life and make them tears of happiness not sadness. Start planning a reunion-gawd almighty-it’s finally over vacation for the two of you. Somewhere warm and tropical…..just close your eyes and feel that slow summer breeze rocking a hammock slowly back and forth as you lay side by side sipping frosty cold adult beverages with little paper umbrellas and skewers of tropical fruity chunks.
i have spoken to sara and i gave her some words of encouragement. after metting her she appeared very strong and relived to be near her soldier. that she supports better than the army does. she is a real trooper and how i wish more wives could be like her. strong enough to speak when needed and kind enough to give unconditional love to that “poag” jim (just kidding brother).
i’ll be back up there tommorow to visit and i need to say thanks for all of your support when i needed a friend.